You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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