Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
