It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
