an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
