Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
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