I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
