they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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