Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
