at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
