You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Randomize
