people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize