it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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