I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
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