you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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