And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Hippo gnu deer
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
