As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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