How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
