is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
