HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
