Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
