Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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