Quick, to the slutcave!
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
