If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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