he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I came so hard my ears popped.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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