I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
