3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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