Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
