All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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