Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
