so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
