I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
