I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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