I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
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