you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
