just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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