We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize