The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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