Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
