And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
