I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
