I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize