Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
