wrigley field is MILF paradise
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
