I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
