Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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