is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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