but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
