just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
