Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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