i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Randomize
